Log in

No account? Create an account
10 December 2007 @ 09:48 pm
[Thread] there is only me  
Whom; Yagami Light and Kira
Rating; R
When; 30 days after the start of Light's imprisonment
AUverse; Kira/Light
Summary; 30 days in prison for a crime you didn't commit is enough to damage anyone's mind.

Light didn't know how much time had passed since he had entered the jail cell. There was no easy way to mark time, since the lights overhead never went off and there were no windows in the room. All he had to mark the passage of time was L's occasional calls - sometimes, the detective would mention how long it had been. L had said during the most recent call that it had been 3 weeks, but that had been a while ago. He had been left alone except for when it was time for meals since then.

He was lying on the ground now, too exhausted to even bother trying to sit up with his hands bound like they were. He had been eating too little and sleeping too much since the start of his imprisonment, and the unhealthy nature of the entire situation was catching up with him. He could just sleep on the floor anyways. He had done that several times already.

He closed his eyes slowly, hoping against hope that, soon, L would realize that he was insane to consider Light to be Kira.
Yagami Light: forbidden fruitluxetlet on December 11th, 2007 06:18 am (UTC)
Kira did not know quite what to think of the situation he found his counterpart in. He already knew that L would imprison him, take away his freedom, find some way to make him crack. And it looked as if the plan was succeeding. He looked pathetic lying on the floor. Broken.

His humiliation would be all worth it in the end. Because Kira will win.

“But what if you are, hm?”

The voice was merely a whisper.
ex_morning_793 on December 11th, 2007 06:27 am (UTC)
Light's eyes flared open at the sound of another voice in the room. He knew he was alone in here, and the voice clearly wasn't L's over the intercom, so who? He scanned the room quickly, his gaze eventually coming to rest on -

On something impossible.

This was the final sign that he was cracking, then. He was hallucinating himself standing there, only... not himself, somehow. The other looked more confident, more sure of himself, and more proud, especially compared to the state Light knew he was in.

"W-who?" he managed to say, finding that his throat had grown sore and dry after too much time without speaking.
Yagami Light: i know what you are thinking~luxetlet on December 11th, 2007 09:36 am (UTC)
Kira needed only a few steps before he was directly in front of his mirror image. The other down looked down at Light almost condescendingly, the beginnings of a smirk playing on his lips.

“I am you and you are me. Rather, I was you before you gave up the Death Note.”

Unlike Light, Kira would never deign to lower himself to the ground given a choice, instead of sitting down next to the other, he perched on the edge of the bed, keeping his cold eyes trained on the other.

Light was who he would have been has he not discovered the Death Note. Innocent, still filled with naïve thoughts about justice. Soon to be chasing down a Kira that will appear soon.
ex_morning_793 on December 11th, 2007 09:41 am (UTC)
This didn't make any sense. Clearly, Light was having some strange break from reality, which couldn't be healthy. Soon L would see him talking to what was surely just air, and he would get Light some kind of help. Surely this was just a hallucination, nothing more.

For now, he just tried to keep himself calm. Even if he was hallucinating, it was no reason to lose his composure. If he panicked, it would just send him deeper into the psychological break.

"What, exactly, is a Death Note?" he asked in a voice that trembled only slightly.
Yagami Light: i know what you are thinking~luxetlet on December 11th, 2007 10:17 am (UTC)
A pause.

“Hallucination? An accurate if not rather a rather usual and if I must say, typical deduction.” Kira said, answering the query that was on his counterpart’s mind.

He ran the back of his hands on his mirror’s image cheek gently. “Does this feel like a hallucination to you though?” Has he ever looked so innocent? It almost seemed they were two person, except Kira knew they were the one and same.

He gave a smile then. “You will remember about it later, Light. But for now, be patient and watch this game play out.”
ex_morning_793 on December 11th, 2007 10:22 am (UTC)
The hallucination was reading Light's thoughts now, and confirming them. At least it was honest, which was one good thing. It still was a less than positive sign that it even existed. He didn't want to think of himself as being capable of going this insane, even under these circumstances.

The touch felt disturbingly real, given the circumstances. Further proof that he was in a bad mental state. He leaned away from it as much as he could, pressing his cheek against the cool concrete instead.

He idly wished that he understood what, exactly, the hallucination was talking about - but it was just a product of stress, and so it probably didn't matter.
Yagami Light: sinfully desirableluxetlet on December 11th, 2007 10:39 am (UTC)
Light’s thoughts amused him. Really now, he has more to worry about than going insane. Who knew how long did L planned to lock him up here?

His smile turned sharp as the other shied away from his touch and got up from the bed, kneeling down on a knee in front of his twin. “What am I talking about? Who am I? Why do I look like you though I am apparently different? Would you like to know, Light?”
ex_morning_793 on December 11th, 2007 10:51 am (UTC)
Light stared up at his twin with wide eyes. That smile... it was dangerous. He never smiled like that, did he? It was the smile of someone with dark intentions, which Light did his best to avoid.

"Of course I want to know what you are," he replied, trying to keep his tone as even as possible.
Yagami Lightluxetlet on December 11th, 2007 11:12 am (UTC)
He leaned forward and lifted his face up to look at himself in the eyes. Light was at the end of his tethers, his psyche fragile and his spirits low. Kira pressed a kiss to his mirror image’s lips and whispered.

Sum quod eris, fui quod sis.”

I am what you will be, I was what you are.

Past, present, future.

They were inexplicably linked. It sometimes made Kira wonder what would he be like at present if he did not pick up the Death Note on that fateful day? But that was unimportant. What was, is that he did and he planned to cleanse the world with it.
ex_morning_793 on December 11th, 2007 11:13 am (UTC)
Now his hallucinatory duplicate was kissing Light. While the sensation was not entirely unpleasant on a physical level, it still disturbed him deeply. What was going on in his mind to lead to this sort of breakdown?

The other's words only confused him further. Was he claiming to be from the future? None of this made any sense, and it frustrated him deeply. The world was supposed to make sense, and the fact it didn't right now disturbed him.

"Explain," he demanded, starting to sound flustered. "Explain what you're talking about, instead of just trying to obfuscate things with pretty Latin phrases."
Yagami Light: i know what you are thinking~luxetlet on December 11th, 2007 11:33 am (UTC)
The fact that the other did not deny him the kiss was an excellent sign. Kira took it as an encouragement.

A smirk.

“Confused, Light? I am a little disappointed that you have not arrived at a conclusion yet, though I suppose that your long imprisonment have left you a little… slow.

Kira was the opposite of Light. He was calm, poised, composed, as if he was speaking to another person instead of himself. “I suppose that it could not be helped. It is not like we are given much allowances by L.” A sigh. “I am Kira.” The quirk of his lips seem to say ‘what does that make you?’
ex_morning_793 on December 11th, 2007 09:17 pm (UTC)
Light was about to protest being called "slow" - he was anything but - but his duplicate's next words caught him entirely off guard. He was Kira? But... then... if that were true...

Then that meant that Light was...

Sum quod eris, fui quod sis.

"That's impossible," he said in a quiet, trembling voice.
Yagami Light: i know what you are thinking~luxetlet on December 12th, 2007 02:28 am (UTC)
I lied. One more tag XD;;
“Hush, would you like L to read your lips?” It was not all impossible. Who knew what other abilities did the other possess? Reading lips was something simple to learn and Kira knew that L kept them under twenty-four hours surveillance.

“I suggest that you either face a blind spot or keep your answers and questions to yourself.” The smirk grew dark again. “It is not like I do not know what is running through our mind.”

His hand ghosted over Light’s body, brushing his eyelashes, touching his lips, collarbone, chest, slowly moving southwards.

“What made you think it is impossible? After all, L suspects that you are Kira. You yourself deducted you were Kira. Is this not the whole point of your imprisonment? To prove that your innocence?” The voice was silky smooth, with a hint of amusement at his mirror image’s reaction.
ex_morning_793 on December 12th, 2007 02:55 am (UTC)
Light shivered at the light touches, trying to control his reactions. Before he had wanted L to discover his breakdown so that he could get some sort of help, but now that he knew the nature of it... he was less certain. If L knew that Light was hallucinating himself as Kira, then...

And so instead of speaking, he thought. I realized that was foolish. There's no way I could be Kira without knowing it. L just needs to realize that so I can get out of here.

Before I go any more insane, he added unintentionally.
Yagami Light: i know what you are thinking~luxetlet on December 12th, 2007 04:18 am (UTC)
“Insanity is subjective matter and as far as I can tell, we are not. After all, someone who is decidedly insane would never think of themselves as such.” A statement? Or a denial?

Kira covered Light’s lips with his own once more, murmuring. “Soon. Soon L will be proven wrong. Our plans are being carried out as we speak. He will come and seek our help and we shall aid him to catch the new Kira. Be patient for a little while longer. Have we ever been wrong before?”

His hand closed around Light’s cock and his thumb caressed the head experimentally through the fabric.
ex_morning_793 on December 12th, 2007 04:29 am (UTC)
Light wanted to reply with If you're Kira, you have to be wrong, but his train of thought was cut off as he felt the other's hand. A wave of pleasure ran through his body at the other's caress, and he gasped with a mix of confusion and enjoyment.

"S-stop," he protested aloud, forgetting about the possibility that L might hear. This was going much too far. A light flush began to come to his cheeks.
Yagami Light: i know what you are thinking~luxetlet on December 12th, 2007 05:01 am (UTC)
Kira looked at his mirror image in the eyes then. “You want this.”

After all, they were the one and the same.

Even as he said that, his hand slipped into Light’s pants, and ran his fingers lightly across his length, teasing the other. It was a strange sight indeed, to watch himself flushing, protesting. At the same time, it was rather… rousing.
ex_morning_793 on December 12th, 2007 05:09 am (UTC)
In some ways, it was true. Light's entire body burned at the other's touch, and as he moved his fingers, another wave of pleasure overtook him. But at the same time... this was Kira, and Kira was nothing more than a murderer. That was all he would ever be.

And what if L saw this display?

He squirmed slightly, trying to pull away.
Yagami Light: sinfully desirableluxetlet on December 31st, 2007 02:03 am (UTC)
If he had worried about L watching, he would not have appeared in the first place. Light would find a way to hide from the detective. A blind spot, or a different angle, they were geniuses, after all.

“Nothing more than a murderer, hm?” he whispered in Light’s ears, even as his thumb rubbed over his head. He smiled as he felt droplets of precum gathering at the slit. Kira ran his finger over them and spread the sticky liquid. He pressed a kiss at his mirror’s image jaw even as he murmured in a low tone. “In that, you are sorely mistaken. I am merely making the world a better place to live in. A world where people need not fear. Do you not agree with me, Light?”
ex_morning_793 on December 31st, 2007 02:30 am (UTC)
Light gasped involuntarily at the caresses and touches of the other. He was far from sexually inexperienced, but this... this was different from any other time. Kira clearly knew exactly what to do to make the experience pleasurable. If it hadn't been for the hallucination's words and the insanity of the entire situation, he might have simply enjoyed this all.

As it was, he tried to keep his anger intact. They'll fear Kira, he thought. Kira isn't removing fear, he's just creating new fear!